"No, n - no, what if someone else needs to use it?" Gods, he was never this shy about it in school. Then again he didn't have half a leg. He still got bullied, just for different reasons. "I'll just... do it in parts."
Top half first, then bottom half. He's a little scared of the latter, but he'll do what he has to.
“Then they could wait?” But fine, okay, he won’t push it. Casper is so, so much more selfless than him. “Whatever you want, 包贝.” He tugs on his hand a little. “C’mon.”
He nods and carefully follows his boyfriend - gods, his boyfriend - and heads out towards the restaurant area. Bob rides on his shoulder - he needs a shower, too! Casper's walking... okay, if not totally confidently. He feels vaguely sick and he doesn't like it at all.
Shang Beida is careful to walk slowly enough that Casper doesn’t have to push himself at all, and hopes that holding hands will be enough to keep him stabilized. Whatever Casper says, he’s definitely firmly closing the door behind them when they get into the shower room, and wishing there was just… a doorstop he could surreptitiously kick under it to barricade it just a tiny bit, just enough to discourage anyone with manners—though considering Glowy Flying Guy, that might not be worth much.
He stops once they’re both in the room and turns to wrap his arms around Casper. Shower in a minute, he needs to hug him and feel reassured that he’s alright. He tucks his face into Casper’s neck and takes a long, shaky breath. They’re okay.
He doesn't really notice - or mind - that the door closes. He glances up at the shower - it looks like one of those disinfecting washes. Okay. Whatever. He hesitates and waits for Bob to flutter over to sit on top of one of the other showers, then pulls his hoodie over his head followed by his shirt. It does reveal that he has a necklace on - a bunch of whitish 'tubes' on a cord. ... Bones. They're bones.
Casper's back is clearly bruised and there's scratches all up his arms from his desperate flailing. There's some smaller scratches on his back too, but mostly it's a few large purple splotches. It's also easy to see now just how damn skinny Casper is. He's not sickly by any means - he always had enough food, just not unlimited amounts. He looks... well, like a skinny, weak nerd, despite what he can actually do.
It's also easier to see how pale his skin naturally is. Casper would blame the German genes, but he really is almost like a ghost. He shudders and glances behind him at Shang Beida. "... How bad is it?" He could heal everything in an instant, but that would just seal up whatever's gotten into the wounds.
“Very… purple. That tree hit you hard, didn’t it.” It isn’t a question, he can see the answer. “Your arms are… uh. Let’s make sure nothing stays in you? I do not think we want those plants under your skin.” Not after what Casper said about the… budding. He’s not going to think about what’s already made its way into his bloodstream. He said he didn’t care what percentage of Casper was human, and that point holds, but he doesn’t think Casper would be very excited about growing leaves. Especially after all this.
He reaches out a hesitant hand to carefully touch Casper’s shoulder. “You want me to help?” This is really not how he wanted to get his boyfriend shirtless. The line of dark purple across his back just makes him see Casper facedown in the dark, too pinned to move, helpless and unresponsive, all over again.
"Yeah. Yeah, no. I don't want that shit." He's not sure how to clean for that - the only option he's used so far has been fire. And he can heal a lot, but he's not sure he wants to go that far. He sighs and leans into the other's hand. It's... warm and comforting, even if his body is a bit cold.
Help... hm. "Y... yeah. I need to make sure that there's nothing left when I clean it. And I... can't really reach the center of my back. Usually I'd use a towel or something but... a helpful hand would be... nice." He flushes very slightly pink, but... it's okay. "Don't... don't leave. Please."
"I'm here as long as you want, 包贝." Both literally in this room right now, and generally at his side. "Let me just... not get my clothes wet."
He steps back and starts removing layers. Because he is a lazy millennial and doesn't have any dignity to speak of anyway, there are only four layers of robes, which he pulls off one at a time, until he's left in loose knee-length pants of thin, undyed silk. Shen Qingqiu wears at least seven, Cucumber-bro must have been miserable.
He swallows and looks at the ground, blushing. This is... probably enough. His pants will dry if they need to. "Um. Yeah. So... there's soap over here I think... Or, actually, I think I've got a bottle of wine in one of my qiankun pouches, we could disinfect properly? It would hurt like a motherfucker, though..."
He glances behind his back and... oh. For one, that's a lot of robes. For another, gods he's cute. "... You don't have to stare down at the tile. You're still gorgeous, schatzi. ... I'd prefer to be disinfected, though I don't want you to waste your wine on - look, I can't get drunk."
He knows that it won't be that way with his wounds, but still. "I... I can take the pain. I promise you, I'll be okay. I've had so much worse than some stinging."
Blushing even harder, now. "I, um. Thank you, 包贝." He's weedy for a cultivator, but he is still a cultivator, and therefore has stupidly flawless skin, and at least some wiry muscle. "You're... I wish I was seeing you with your shirt off in better circumstances so I could appreciate it properly." All the injuries sort of detract from the ability to ogle boyfriend. The skinny nerd-ness is not at all offputting, Casper is cute.
"It's not a waste of my wine. I only have it in my everyday qiankun pouches because it's useful for practical things, not because I need... emergency drinking supply."
"I don't... I don't want to hurt you, 心爱. I know you say you can take it but... I don't want you to hurt at all, not just... bear it." The way he talks about being hurt is just...
"I would rather get hurt than get infected which will do gods only know what. Who knows what kind of plants or germs are around here? So please... it's okay. If it's you, it's okay. I just don't want to hurt you later down the line." Part of his mind notes that he's begging to be hurt and files that away as 'things I don't want to think about right now'.
He bows his head and closes his eyes. He just wants to not upset Shang Beida. He wants his boyfriend to be happy, not upset.
Oh, he doesn't like that defeated-looking bowed head. He steps closer and kisses Casper on the temple. "I don't want you infected either. And I'm worried about you, not me." Like he's said, he's pretty durable. As long as nothing affects Casper's mind, he's not worried about what might happen to himself. "Give me a second."
He turns back to his robes and roots through qiankun pouches until he turns up the right bottle. He pulls out a length of bandage, for good measure, to use as a cloth to clean with. Turns back. Deep breath. "Ready, 心爱?"
"Okay." He leans into the kiss and then pulls back when the other does. It feels like forever before Beida speaks again, but he nods. "Yeah. Go for it." He tenses slightly as he prepares for the pain to touch him. It's better this way.
It'd hurt so much if he were to hurt the other by getting sick or... mind controlled or whatever the plants here could do.
Shang Beida pours a generous amount of alcohol onto the folded wad of cloth--there's probably a better way to do this, but he is still not Mu Qingfang, so this is what he's got--grits his teeth, and wipes firmly at one of the larger scratches on Casper's bicep, where there's mud and bits of bark ground into the flesh. He tries to steel himself against Casper's reaction, but he does not like this! Pulling the Ling Hua dart out of Mobei-Jun was easier, his king was unconscious and also he wasn't in love with him!
Casper lets out a long sigh - it hurts, but it's not unbearable. His arm shakes a little bit in response to the pain, and he stays still as the other wipes at the skin. "I'm fine. It's okay. Keep going."
He's not sure if Shang Beida needs the reassurance, but it probably can't hurt?
Shang Beida kind of wishes they had cleaned these out before everything sat in them for hours, but for once he has the tact to bite his tongue on that and not just make Casper feel worse to no purpose. “Okay, 宝贝. Just— tell me if you need to take a break, okay?” He goes over the arm with each section of cloth until it’s too filthy to keep going, and eventually gets down to clean skin and… scratches with bits embedded in them. “I, um. I think I’m going to need like, a needle or a knife or something to pick some of this out? There’s like… stuff… embedded under the skin.” That they really don’t want to leave there. “Um. Are you okay?”
"... Okay." He's not like... a fan of sharp objects but he recognizes their use. Especially in this situation... "Don't worry about opening up a wound - it'll heal fast once I let it. And I trust you."
Anyone else approaching him with this? No. Absolutely not. But Shang Beida? He trusts the older man. As much as he doesn't want to do this he knows he has to. "I don't want to end up like... that thing." The bog body. Why did he think of it again? It's not the dead body that bothers him, it's the living things on it.
Shang Beida presses a fleeting kiss to a clear patch of Casper’s shoulder, then returns to rooting through his robes. “Let me see what I’ve got…”
He turns up a dagger, a kitchen knife, and eventually a sewing kit (for emergency repairs!) with needles that he feels better about. He takes the biggest one and returns to Casper. Deep breaths. “Okay. Found a needle. I… you ready, baobei?”
"... Yeah." He doesn't want to, but he knows it's important. He keeps his eyes tightly shut and tenses up. He doesn't want this, he really isn't comfortable with needles, Still, he has no real choice in the matter.
He takes a deep breath and tries to not hold it. "... Go ahead."
“Tell me if you need me to stop,” Shang Beida demands. It’s patently obvious how incredibly uncomfortable with this Casper is, every line of his body tense, but… they both don’t want bits of plant inside him, and that isn’t going to go away by wishing. He braces a careful hand on his boyfriend’s arm, grits his teeth, and starts picking out fragments of bark, flinching a little when the wounds he’s cleaning start bleeding afresh. Casper wasn’t kidding about his blood being lighter than ordinary human blood. He tries to focus on that and on his task rather than on which one of them might be trembling.
It hurts, but it's not unbearable. The quick sharp pokes to his arm... it's like when someone messes up drawing blood. But he's stronger than he used to be. ... He can feel himself bleeding, even though his eyes are closed. His instinct is to heal, but not yet. Not yet...
"I'm okay. Keep going." The wound are at least for the most part fairly shallow - there's no deep gashes on his skin. Picking it out is a little less of a chore than it would be otherwise. Still, he doesn't like it - but there's lots of things that he doesn't like that have to be done.
“You’re doing great, baobei.” Shang Beida might be trying to reassure himself as much as Casper. He doesn’t actually particularly like causing pain in general—not to real people, anyway, fiction doesn’t count—and he likes it even less when it’s someone he cares about this much. He works his way down Casper’s arm to his wrist, then gently turns his hand over to work on his battered palm. And he’s a sap, so first he presses a kiss to the center of Casper’s pale hand.
He keeps his palm steady, rolling his eyes slightly at Shang Beida. "Don't get yourself infected..." He's still not cleaned off, but he's more worried about the other than himself. "I'm okay. I promise, schatzi. You're doing fine. I trust you." There's some cuts on his hands, but most of the issue is dirt under his nails which is... somewhat harder to pick out without blood.
“Hm. I don’t think I have like, a nail brush… I don’t want to stick a needle under your fingernails that’s not happening. Um. Maybe a hair stick…” He pats vaguely at his head before he finds the simple silver hair crown holding up his bun and pulls the stick out, leaving his hair to fall loose around his shoulders. He’s a millennial, so like, he doesn’t actually feel wildly improper like this, but also, he has lived in fantasy ancient China for decades and he kinda does. Having his hair down is almost more improper feeling than having his robes off, because like, group baths are a thing. But it’s Casper, it’s fine. He tosses the crown over at his robes and examines the stick. “Yeah, I think that’s a reasonable level of pointy but not sharp.” He looks up at Casper, hair straggling into his face. “I’m gonna rinse this cloth out first, I think? And then we can clean under your nails. Um, unless you want to do it, you can reach yourself, I…” He’s still holding Casper’s hand in one of his, blushing a little. “However you want.”
He looks up and - oh. He... looks really cute with his hair down, too. "Ah -" What was the question? Oh. Oh, right.
"Okay. And I... I mean if you think you can get it all, I... don't mind being taken care of if it's you." It's a weird feeling, but... it's warm. Is this what feeling wanted is like? He's not sure and his body still feels weird from various other reasons, so it's hard to tell.
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Date: 2024-03-07 08:51 pm (UTC)From:Top half first, then bottom half. He's a little scared of the latter, but he'll do what he has to.
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Date: 2024-03-07 09:13 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-07 09:17 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-07 09:28 pm (UTC)From:He stops once they’re both in the room and turns to wrap his arms around Casper. Shower in a minute, he needs to hug him and feel reassured that he’s alright. He tucks his face into Casper’s neck and takes a long, shaky breath. They’re okay.
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Date: 2024-03-07 11:33 pm (UTC)From:Casper's back is clearly bruised and there's scratches all up his arms from his desperate flailing. There's some smaller scratches on his back too, but mostly it's a few large purple splotches. It's also easy to see now just how damn skinny Casper is. He's not sickly by any means - he always had enough food, just not unlimited amounts. He looks... well, like a skinny, weak nerd, despite what he can actually do.
It's also easier to see how pale his skin naturally is. Casper would blame the German genes, but he really is almost like a ghost. He shudders and glances behind him at Shang Beida. "... How bad is it?" He could heal everything in an instant, but that would just seal up whatever's gotten into the wounds.
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Date: 2024-03-07 11:44 pm (UTC)From:He reaches out a hesitant hand to carefully touch Casper’s shoulder. “You want me to help?” This is really not how he wanted to get his boyfriend shirtless. The line of dark purple across his back just makes him see Casper facedown in the dark, too pinned to move, helpless and unresponsive, all over again.
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Date: 2024-03-08 01:33 am (UTC)From:Help... hm. "Y... yeah. I need to make sure that there's nothing left when I clean it. And I... can't really reach the center of my back. Usually I'd use a towel or something but... a helpful hand would be... nice." He flushes very slightly pink, but... it's okay. "Don't... don't leave. Please."
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Date: 2024-03-08 01:42 am (UTC)From:He steps back and starts removing layers. Because he is a lazy millennial and doesn't have any dignity to speak of anyway, there are only four layers of robes, which he pulls off one at a time, until he's left in loose knee-length pants of thin, undyed silk. Shen Qingqiu wears at least seven, Cucumber-bro must have been miserable.
He swallows and looks at the ground, blushing. This is... probably enough. His pants will dry if they need to. "Um. Yeah. So... there's soap over here I think... Or, actually, I think I've got a bottle of wine in one of my qiankun pouches, we could disinfect properly? It would hurt like a motherfucker, though..."
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Date: 2024-03-08 01:46 am (UTC)From:He knows that it won't be that way with his wounds, but still. "I... I can take the pain. I promise you, I'll be okay. I've had so much worse than some stinging."
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Date: 2024-03-08 01:55 am (UTC)From:"It's not a waste of my wine. I only have it in my everyday qiankun pouches because it's useful for practical things, not because I need... emergency drinking supply."
"I don't... I don't want to hurt you, 心爱. I know you say you can take it but... I don't want you to hurt at all, not just... bear it." The way he talks about being hurt is just...
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Date: 2024-03-08 02:02 am (UTC)From:He bows his head and closes his eyes. He just wants to not upset Shang Beida. He wants his boyfriend to be happy, not upset.
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Date: 2024-03-08 02:06 am (UTC)From:He turns back to his robes and roots through qiankun pouches until he turns up the right bottle. He pulls out a length of bandage, for good measure, to use as a cloth to clean with. Turns back. Deep breath. "Ready, 心爱?"
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Date: 2024-03-08 03:14 am (UTC)From:It'd hurt so much if he were to hurt the other by getting sick or... mind controlled or whatever the plants here could do.
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Date: 2024-03-08 03:22 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-08 07:13 pm (UTC)From:He's not sure if Shang Beida needs the reassurance, but it probably can't hurt?
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Date: 2024-03-08 08:03 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-08 08:17 pm (UTC)From:Anyone else approaching him with this? No. Absolutely not. But Shang Beida? He trusts the older man. As much as he doesn't want to do this he knows he has to. "I don't want to end up like... that thing." The bog body. Why did he think of it again? It's not the dead body that bothers him, it's the living things on it.
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Date: 2024-03-09 03:49 am (UTC)From:He turns up a dagger, a kitchen knife, and eventually a sewing kit (for emergency repairs!) with needles that he feels better about. He takes the biggest one and returns to Casper. Deep breaths. “Okay. Found a needle. I… you ready, baobei?”
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Date: 2024-03-09 04:13 pm (UTC)From:He takes a deep breath and tries to not hold it. "... Go ahead."
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Date: 2024-03-09 04:30 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-09 04:55 pm (UTC)From:"I'm okay. Keep going." The wound are at least for the most part fairly shallow - there's no deep gashes on his skin. Picking it out is a little less of a chore than it would be otherwise. Still, he doesn't like it - but there's lots of things that he doesn't like that have to be done.
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Date: 2024-03-09 05:28 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-09 10:40 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-10 12:58 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2024-03-10 03:26 am (UTC)From:"Okay. And I... I mean if you think you can get it all, I... don't mind being taken care of if it's you." It's a weird feeling, but... it's warm. Is this what feeling wanted is like? He's not sure and his body still feels weird from various other reasons, so it's hard to tell.
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From:cw: ptsd trauma response
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