"... I don't - I don't know if... sorry." He turns away, slumping and trying to think of what to do. "... Sorry. I just..." He can't stop apologizing - he could make a joke about him being too Canadian, but it doesn't feel like the right time for jokes.
How to even explain it? "I don't want to make you upset. I just... I don't deserve -" He stops himself there. Doesn't deserve what? A boyfriend? To be kissed? ... To be loved? Even if he feels that way - and he does - it's not the right thing to say. "I'm just scared." Of what, he's not sure. He presses his face into his palm, taking a breath.
"I - I keep imagining the things that my group back home would say. What my parents would say. And I know that it... it shouldn't matter. That what they say shouldn't matter, because they're mean to me. But I can't just... shut off caring about them."
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Date: 2024-04-21 07:54 pm (UTC)From:How to even explain it? "I don't want to make you upset. I just... I don't deserve -" He stops himself there. Doesn't deserve what? A boyfriend? To be kissed? ... To be loved? Even if he feels that way - and he does - it's not the right thing to say. "I'm just scared." Of what, he's not sure. He presses his face into his palm, taking a breath.
"I - I keep imagining the things that my group back home would say. What my parents would say. And I know that it... it shouldn't matter. That what they say shouldn't matter, because they're mean to me. But I can't just... shut off caring about them."